I am completely struggling with the whole Higher Power thing still. For some reason almost all forms of "recovery" are based on a 12 step program that talks about a Higher Power. Yes, there is even a 12 step program for people with bipolar (Affective Disorders Anonymous). Here are the 12 steps for that program:
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We admitted we were powerless over our affective disorder-- that our lives had become unmanageable.
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Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
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Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of the God of our understanding.
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Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
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Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
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Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
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Humbly asked God to remove our shortcomings.
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Made a list of all persons we have harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.
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Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
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Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
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Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with the God of our understanding, praying only for knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out.
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Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to persons with affective disorder and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
This week I don't see my therapist so maybe that is why I don't have the Higher Power warm fuzzies. She gets me to put aside my rational scientific side and open my heart to the hope that I am not truly alone. Because let me tell you alone is a very sad and hopeless place to be.
Take Care,
Daria
2 comments:
There is a non-reliogiously oriented recovery program called SOS, that avoids any of the "higher power" thing so prevalent in AA and prefers to focus on the individual. SoS stands for Saving our Selves. You might be able to find some the their information more in line with yuor own beliefs, and your UU minister shoul dbe able to help you with this as well. Believing in god,a higher pwer, whatevr, calls for a "willing suspension of disbelief" and I think you can either do that or you can't.
Maybe thinking about God as just a cosmic consciousness would help. I have experienced ESP in the past and that convinced me that there is knowledge floating around in the atmosphere, which I call cosmic consciousness. I don't pray to a personified God, but I do try to be receptive to the knowledge across time and space that can help me understand my role in this life. Best of luck and blessings to you!
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